Ever have so many wild thoughts flying around your head that it makes writing impossible?? It's happening right now.. There are so many things I want to say but I can't grasp the right words that would make any sense to anyone.. Not that very many or anyone reads this, but it is the internet and things have a way of getting out..
I was once asked a question a few years ago that on occasion creeps it's way into my head.. "What are you thinking??" When I hear it in my head I try my hardest to come up with answer.. Most often there isn't one which makes me wonder if I'm as smart as I think I am.. Am I just going through the motions of life without putting any kind of thought into it?? Am I so full of problems that instead of facing them and trying to over come them, I just ignore them??
This passed weekend I was told that I was hard to read.. I always thought I was a wide open book to the point where the spine was cracking from being open so much.. People have always been able to tell my moods just from my facial expressions.. They know when to joke around with me and when not to.. There are times when I'm so animated with whats going on around me that people can't get me to shut up.. But more often then not I'm usually quiet and taking in my surroundings.. Feeding off the vibe that my friends omit and either enjoying the good times or listening to them talk about their problems and offer up the best advice I can give them..
Perhaps there is nothing wrong with me after all, because the same person that asked me what I was thinking was the same one that said I was hard to read.. I've never been one to judge but maybe they should be asking themselves those questions rather then pass them on to me.. They might be the one thats hard to read or not thinking clearly..
- Alone Together